We went to see that trailer today, we might be moving into it.. though it does have a year long lease. The trailer was much nicer then the one we are currently living in. The yard is an acer. There are trees and a very nice yard. A patio on both sides of the house, 2 bedrooms, 2 bath.. both have showers.. oohhh. The landlady even said she'd have a travel trailer put on the property, it would be livable, with electricity and water. So Mom says if we move in.. (I'm hoping when) I'll get that to use as my space and yeah get a load of this, art studio. Yeah.. it would be that fantastic to most of y'all out there with your art supplies, and special desks and classes and etc etc but to me it would be prefect. No bouncing beds while trying to paint, no metal dump trucks ramming into you while inking, no flying wii remotes within 3 inches of your head while sketching... yeah, it'll be the life.
I really liked the landlady, she was special, and an art student herself. She said some things to me that freaked me out at first, no one could know that I thought.. and then I realized that she just understood. Understood me, and what's going on in my life without me saying a word. It was strange, very few people actually see through my "happy mask" that I wear. She looked at me and said things, things she couldn't possibly know. I want to speak with her again, I think I have something to learn from her... I just need to figure out what exactly that is.
Besides that and back to the house, the property has two families with horses next door.. awesome. I've never been riding a horse before but the landlady says that we'll be on those horses within a month. She thinks we are really going to "click" with the neighbor kids. Though Les, (the handy man guy we have truly befriended) is a monkey.. he told her I was 14 years old.. the nerve of that guy I swear, he screws with anyone he can.. oh wait, that sounds a little like me... no nevermind. However, have to be nice to Les, he's the one fixing the travel trailer up for me, and fixing the trailer trailer up for us. lol he's also... looking for a guitar for me..
I mentioned my search for one.. that
I could afford. Not only does he play a little but he fixes guitars too! He's a nut but a really cool and nice guy.
Now, I just got my new computer hooked up a few days ago... so I'm on that and it is awesome, buuuut I still need to get my old files off of the old computer and on to this one who I have named "Kitten" long story short, the old computer I named "Kitty" and this computer is one of those mini cases while my old one was full size so I named this one "Kitten" yeah, corny.. I know right?!!
The other part of telling you that is to say that I haven't hooked up my scanner yet, mostly because I'll need to move it, hook it up, scan, unhook it up, and move it again every time I need to scan. The old computer had the scanner sitting on top of it.. this computer is smaller then the scanner.. see the dilemma? So mostly from laziness and lack of inspiration and creativity I have no drawing for you now. I will try and find something to put up soon, but honestly.. my desire to draw at all is at a all time low.. I can't stand it.. every time I pick up a sketchpad I have this NEED to throw it across the room. *No.. I haven't done it* I'm so frustrated with it all at the moment, no creative ideas, no desire to draw.. at the moment heres my outlook on drawing: Just something I do.
You know how you have things you do just because you've always done them? That's about as much I feel attracted to drawing right now, it's like the need to eat.. but nothing sounds good... you eat because it's what you do.. but you have no desire for it because nothing sounds good.. well, I'm drawing because it's what I do... but I have no passion for it at the moment. It doesn't make me happy.. and I'm upset to say that.. but it's the down right truth. I think I just need to find some inspiration, mom says I'm burnt out and if I stop completely for a while my love for it will come back... but the day I decided I needed to improve my art enough to get a job in art so I could support my family.. that's the day my desire, and passion died and it hasn't come back... sometimes I think I found it... but then it's gone again.
I may just take a break from art all together for a while, but then again, if I'm not drawing.. I don't know what else to do. at the moment, art is my life.
